you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
it glows. i had to have it.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
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