Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize