Yo dont text me then not text me
Hello Stephanie, you need to come pick me up at Par Blvrd correctional facility and bring $750-$1000 for bail. I just got a DUI. Thank you.
What!?!?! How are you txting?!
Because this is Officer Reynolds, and I just arrested your boyfriend.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
Randomize