You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
Randomize
