carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
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