reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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