Buhtt sex?
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
Also I think I drunkenly signed up to be an uber driver or something because they keep emailing me to fill out a background check
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
Randomize
