There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
Randomize
