Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Randomize
