Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
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