# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
Randomize