We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
Randomize
