I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
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