Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
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