I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
not ubering you a puppy
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
