he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
and you said cock pushups were impossible
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
