I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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