What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
Randomize
