Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
As shirtless as possible
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize