It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
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