It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Randomize
