she looked like the bat from fern gully.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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