butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I found the TV remote. It was in the washing machine along with the chicken wings you kept complaining to Domino's about that they 'never delivered'
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
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