He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
Pants 0. Shit 1.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize
