Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
Randomize
