On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
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