So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
