Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
Randomize
