i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
When people ask about my bruises, I'm just going to say it was a doorknob. Or possibly a group of doorknobs. Angry doorknobs.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
