OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
Cover your peen. We're going out.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Your penis caused this!
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
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