Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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