i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize