Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Randomize