Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
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Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
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