whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
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