Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
my grandpa was trying to put butter into the pepsi and i'm like "grandpa what are you doing" and he looks down and goes "well i guess that wouldn't taste good anyway"
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
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I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
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I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
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