How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
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