I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
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