i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
You need a sexual gate keeper
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize
