one two three fourrrrnication!
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
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