just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
Randomize
