i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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