Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
