The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
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