He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
We have so much sex to catch up on
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
that is very illegal...i love you.
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