today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
I love you.
Bad choice
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize