I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
You have to summon your inner elephant
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
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