Soap is not a condiment
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
Randomize
