If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
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