Well apparently he's into motor boating.
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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